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50 Shades of Abuse Flyer - Canada

Use, redistribute, print. 

Click image and magnify for large version.

Okay. I understood all the flack Twilight got for being an abusive relationship. Because it was and it was being read by a very young and impressionable audience. But ffs, 50 Shades is an ADULT NOVEL. Iit is about a BDSM couple. Which - newsflash - do exist. It is a completely consensual form of dominate/submissive sex play. The whole concept of domestic violence and abuse is that one side exerts control over an unwilling victim. I don’t recall Anastasia, or whatever she’s called, protesting to Christian’s form of sex. If I remember correctly, she quite enjoyed it! So before you condemn a work of romanticizedfiction, actually consider it’s audience and remember that they are mature and capable enough to know the difference between reality and fiction.

so i guess you didn’t read the parts where he coerces her and the part where he continues after she has used her safeword and acts like a fucking creep whenever they aren’t having sex

it is the worst possible introduction to BDSM i could imagine

i know my shit okay

im hoping the people defending this book are 1. never getting into BDSM 2. not currently into BDSM 3. havent read the book bc i dont want to believe anyone is that fucking stupid

Let me

just

fucking

drop

some fucking

knowledge on you right now.

Wanna know the BDSM mantra? Safe, sane, consensual.

So let me explain why this book was devoid of all three of these things.

Safe - In the first few chapters of the novel, Christian Grey tracks Ana’s cell phone to find her at a club. Takes her home when she’s drunk, changes her when she’s so intoxicated she doesn’t remember him doing so,and informs her he will be keeping tabs on her for her own benefit. This is not the behaviour of a respectable Dominant. This is the behaviour of a power hungry, abusive asshole who really can’t take no for an answer.

Sane - One of the most important parts of BDSM is aftercare. Scenes can be extremely traumatizing and intense for the submissive. Aftercare is anything from petting to cuddling to holding to sweet talking, whatever degree of gentleness a bottom would need to pull them out of “subspace”. How does Christian provide aftercare? He submits Ana to a traumatizing first time spanking experience AND THEN FUCKING LEAVES. AND GETS MAD THAT SHE DIDN’T TELL HIM SHE WAS UPSET. He’s the one who should fucking know better! That, again, is not the act of a responsible Dominant. It’s the act of a selfish abuser.

Consensual - Did I mention he undressed her when she was belligerently drunk? Tracked her phone to locate her? He also buys her a new car despite her saying no countless times. Now, consent is important for any kind of sexual activity at all. Consent means informed, consent means enthusiastic. Informed, enthusiastic consent. This is crucial in a BDSM setting. Scenes can be extremely intense, especially for the bottom. What is Christian’s form of obtaining consent? Handing Ana a fucking contract highlighting all the things he wants to do her asshole and asking her to sign it. She was a virgin (Don’t even get me fucking started.) who had never before been exposed to BDSM. Entering in that kind of relationship takes a gargantuan amount of trust and knowledge so you know exactly what you’re getting into. Not reading a list of kinks on a piece of paper and signing your rights to say no away. Christian didn’t offer her resources, he didn’t offer her information. He gave her an ultimatum. That is not the sort of consent a responsible Dom/me would seek from their submissive.

Fuck. This. book. It’s written in a shitty way, it’s a terrible example of a BDSM relationship (ask anybody already involved in the lifestyle and watch them go blue in the face just thinking about it), which is already faced with enough prejudice and misunderstand, and it romanticizes and glorifies abuse.

And this post is going into my bookmarks, because it is beautiful.

What scares me most is the fact that people, misinformed and ignorant people, will now try to enter the community/find play partners with the dangerous ideas of what BDSM is. They won’t respect a sub, they won’t listen.

And that can seriously hurt people. People can DIE.

For Anon

kate-wisehart:

lance-corporal-heichou-ass:

einar-fox:

sassmaster-general:

nostlenne:

nietzschesghost:

yarriinwonderland:

congenitalprogramming:

psychosexuality:

unbridledlearning:

thewomanfromitaly:

outofstratford:

FIFTY SHADES OF GREY || OFFICIAL TRAILER

You’re fucking joking

ewwwwwww

Look how they tried to make this abusive piece of shit sexy. 

Ugh.

After this shit is released, expect a flood of expecting subs who don’t know that it’s abuse and more fake Doms preying on them. 

Yep. A flood of defensive posts, a flood of drama, a flood of exuberant basement dwelling shitdicks given new fuel in their predation. A flood of fucked up shit all around, a flood of teenaged girls who will grow up romanticizing this sort of thing.
Yaaay.

Fuck. Like I know the book is trash. I know the former beta, back when it was just online fanfic who hates it with all her heart because the author refused to listen to her speak about BDSM. I’ve attempted the read the horseshit and failed before the third sentence.

And yet…

Fuck.

I think listener-blue and I should see this trainwreck.

Bdsm community, you’ve got a big storm coming.

I just hope audiences will stop to listen to people who are actually a part of the BDSM community when we say, “THIS IS NOT HOW IT WORKS.”

As a sub, I am very protective of other subs, and I don’t want any of them to think that this kind of relationship is healthy. BDSM is safe, sane, and consensual: always. If it isn’t, it’s abuse. Fifty Shades is about abuse, plain and simple. I don’t care what the author calls it; it—is—abuse.

Please, please, please, if you are thinking of joining the BDSM community, do not use Fifty Shades as a tutorial or a guide. Talk to people in the community. Don’t let yourself be beguiled and bamboozled by abusive people masquerading as doms. Don’t let anyone tell you that Fifty Shades is an accurate representation of BDSM. Don’t let anyone tell you that BDSM is abuse.

Talk to us. Come to us. Let us help you.

Please.

This ^  All of this.  ^^^^^^

As a sub, I absolutely know that this bullshit is abuse

I’m so creeped out over the above comment about how EL James refused to listen to their beta about BDSM.

What this means is that not only did she not research BDSM, but that she was directly given information and chose to dismiss it in favor of this bullshit.

There’s ignorance and then there’s just willfully presenting bad relationships as the ideal.

loosescrewslefty:

guardianofscrewingup:

v-mazing:

If you had to make me choose between Young!Hiccup or Older!Hiccup, I don’t think I could. He’s still his adorkable self whether he’s 15 or 20. 

I love how his impersonating his dad game only improved over the years. 

I think that’s more because he was bitter and angry in the first gifset, but in the second he’s just messing around. Hiccup’s body language is very expressive that way. XDDD

(Source: graphrofberk)

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